


In the Slytherin Common Room

by LyrebirdSong



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Slice of Life, Teenagers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-07
Updated: 2020-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-18 11:50:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21710308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LyrebirdSong/pseuds/LyrebirdSong
Summary: 8 teenagers sit in the Slytherin Common Room.There are no politicians, no manipulations. Just teens having a conversation.Short slice of life look at student Life at Hogwarts.
Comments: 6
Kudos: 10





	1. Chapter 1

Eight fourth year Slytherins sit on or around the sofas near the great glass wall that looks into the Great Lake. Greenish light filters through and mixes with the white light of the ceiling sconces. The OWL and NEWT students have called dibs on all the coveted study tables near the small Slytherin library.

Draco Malfoy has one leg stretched and another propped up as he sits on the floor. He is pointedly staring out the window at the silvery fish that flit past. His unfinished charms work lies propped against his knee, forgotten. His back is pressed against Pansy Parkinson's stockinged feet.

Pansy is sitting on the right sofa, kneading Draco's shoulders with her toes while painting Tracy Davis's nails. Tracy sits beside her and is blowing dry the nails on her other hand.

Daphne Greengrass sits in the lone armchair. Her feet are tucked under her and she is furiously marking Blaise Zabini's runes paper in red ink.

Blaise sits on the floor opposite Theodore Nott at the coffee table. He is constantly shifting the position of his limbs as he tries to divine Theo's next chess move. He moves a piece and swears at Theo's answering grin.

Theo moves a piece and leans back on the left sofa, smiling as he says 'checkmate'. Vincent Crabbe, beside Theo, offers the winner a chocolate frog.

And Gregory Goyle sits, hunched, on Daphne's abandoned footstool as he tries to divine the meaning behind Hagrid's scrawl on his COMC essay. Abruptly, he says,

'What even is the difference between poisonous and venomous? I though they meant the same thing!'

'If it bites you and you die - it's venomous,' Vince says helpfully, 'but if you bite it and you die - then it's poisonous.'

'What if it bites me and it dies?' Greg asks.

'Then you're poisonous, weren't you listening?' says Pansy, sitting up to jab a nailpolish brush in his direction and narrowly missing kicking Draco in the head in the process.

'What if it bites itself and I die?' asks Draco to a flummoxed Vince.

'Well that's obviously the Black Arts,' responds Blaise after several moments.

'What if it bites me and someone else dies?' asks Theo.

'That's correlation not causation,' says Tracy who had just endured an arithmancy class that devolved into a 20 minute rant on the topic by the professor.

'Oh yeah,' says Theo, who was in the same class, 'but what if we bite each other and nothing happens?'

'Then that's kinky,' says Daphne without looking up from Blaise's now unrecognisable paper.

There is a stunned silence from the group.

'I didn't know you were listening,' says Greg finally.

'I'm always listening,' says Daphne whilst visciously striking through a sentence with her quill.

'Well, that's not creepy at all,' says Pansy, concentrating on Tracey's final finger, 'there all done.'

Pansy pushes against Draco's back with her feet before standing and stretching.

'Well, Draco, you said you'd take me on a tour of the grounds, we should probably go,' she says.

'I did?' a glare from Pansy, 'oh right, of course, give me a minute Pans,' he pulls on his shoes as she pulls him to the common room entrance.

'Tour of a broom cupboard more like' says Vince at the same time as Tracey says, 'Those two are not subtle.'

Daphne unfolds her legs and hands the paper to Blaise, 'I made a few small edits but it's fine overall'.

Blaise's face falls as he sees what's left of the paper.

'I'm going to get some tea and biscuits, does any one want anything,' Daphne says.

'I'll come, you have terrible taste in biscuits,' said Theo leaping to his feet.

'I do not!'

'Do too!'

The duo bicker all through the common room even as they catch glares of the 5th years.

'They're going to bang,' says Vince confidently.

'What?!' cries Blaise, 'Theo hates Daphne.'

'I don't mean right now,' Vince says while rolling his eyes, "but I bet you my chocolate frog card collection that they will by this time next year.'

'I don't want your card collection,' Blaise sneers, the effect marred by red ink that's somehow made its way from his paper to his face, 'but if you can get your cousin to get me backstage tickets to the Weird Sisters I'll take that bet'

'Fine, but if I win you have to do my Potions homework for a month.'

The two boys shake hands.

'Why do you think they're gonna get together,' asks Tracey.

'Because they always come back with Daph's favorites and Theo always let's her have the last one.'

'Fuck,' Blaise later says when Theo and Daphne return with Daphne's favorite biscuits.


	2. Arania Exumai

It is an ordinary Thursday afternoon and the Slytherin common room is busy with the sounds of students. A group of third years are found in the space in front of the Lake window attempting to learn the dance to the latest  _ Spellbound  _ tune from the steps listed in  _ Mizz Witch _ magazine. A fifth year is practicing his monologue for his correspondence OWL in Performing Arts in front of the portrait wall and Blaise Zabini, Theodore Nott, Daphne Greengrass and Tracy Davis are relaxing in the prime real estate in front of the fire.

Tracy has kicked off her shoes and is reading a copy of one of the summer editions of Bliss magazine with a charm applied that makes it appear to be a text of the casters choosing. Tracy has chosen Slavic Plants and Poultices: Regional variations across the Baltic because she can’t imagine anyone asking her about it.

Daphne is sitting on the sofa with Blaise sitting facing away from her on the floor in front of her. The expression of pained bliss on his face is likely because one of Daphne’s elbows is digging through his shirt and into a particularly tight knot in his back.

Theo, also on the couch is tucked up against a number of cushions. One leg is bent and being used to brace a journal. He scratches his quill across a page while an inkpot purchase precariously on the arm of the sofa behind him.

“No wonder the muggleborns scoff at what the wizards wear while trying to blend in,” Tracey mutters to herself while flipping a page.

“You know Blaise, you wouldn’t have these headaches if you maintained a proper posture while you were studying.” 

“You are half way down my back you daft bint,” Blaise complains, “What’s that got to do with-”

He stops with a yelp as Daphne presses against a particular spot right by his shoulder blade.

“How the -” Blaise begins, “Why do I feel that pain in my forehead?”

It is just after that demand that Professor Snape stalks into the common room with billowing robes, an uncharacteristic air of frustration and a tiny first year.

He scans the assembled Slytherins for his quarry before deciding that a visual determination would waste his time. He makes a simple decision.

“Miss Greengrass,” he states and watches two chestnut headed bodies stiffen in their chairs, before adding, “the elder.”

One relaxes, the other stands and turns around.

“How can I be of assistance Professor,” Daphne responds and frowns when she sees her younger brother, Clematis, being towed along as Professor Snape leads the child to her space.

“Miss Greengrass, you will take  _ this child  _ in hand and ensure that he has some manners befitting of a slytherin before the end of this evening.”

Daphne’s frown deepens before responding, “He is well schooled in manners, professor, I am sure that we can remedy any lapse in his memory before you see him again.”

“See that you do,” Snapes eye’s narrow on Blaise Zabini’s shaking shoulders, “are you cold Mr Zabini.”

“No sir,” comes the strangled reply from the boy who insofar has refused to turn around.

Snape’s eyes bore into the back of Zabini’s head for a moment longer before turning to leave and stalking out of the common room. Gradually, noise levels return to normal.

“Gods that man is  _ stiff _ ,” exclaims Tracey at the same time that Astoria runs over and Daphne begins scolding their younger brother.

“Clematis Arturo Greengrass what in Morgana’s name did you do, you absolute buffoon?”

Blaise is no longer trying to hide his laughter and has slumped to the ground under the weight of unrestrained mirth.

“I don’t know!” Clem states, “I just asked a question about the spell he was teaching us!”

“Tell me the exact exchange that resulted in him asking you to remain behind after class.” Daphne stated with deliberate intonation.

“He was teaching us  _ Arania Exumai _ to get rid of spiders.”

“Go on.”

“And I asked why he was teaching us that one instead of letting us use the anti-arachne potion spray thingy”

“Morgana’s tits,” Blaise mutters as Astoria’s mouth drops open.

“And then he said that seeing as I was so learned I could perhaps teach the class the best way to deal with magical spiders.”

“Please tell me that you didn’t actually answered him,” Daphne asked seriously, staring deeply into Clem’s eyes.   
  
“So I said that instead of using Dad Magic to get rid of a spider, just spray the Anti-arachne potion about and it’ll stop them from coming in your house at all.”

“ _ Dad magic, _ ” Blaise gasps and wheezes laughter into the couch, he wipes his tears on the cushions. A hysterical giggle bursts out of Astoria as she sends a shocked look to Daphne to gauge her reaction.

Daphne rolls her eyes and lectures her brother about why it is a danger to imply that one’s defense teacher cannot appropriately deal with something like spiders when it is well known that he is exceptionally talented at defending against the dark arts and not only that, but  _ “you implied that Professor Snape’s spells are to be looked down upon”. _

Clem’s goes white and then goes red.

“Balls,” he says. “I should write an apology,”

“Indeed,” says Daphne, she looks significantly at Astoria.   
  
“I’ll just go and help him,” says Astoria who turns and follows Clem to a clear table.

Daphne collapses on the sofa muttering to herself. Theo looks at her in concern and asks if she needs to go and recharge for a bit.

“Gods yes,” she replies, “But I have to write a letter home first.”

Theo gets up to follow her.

“Recharge, he calls it.” scoffs Blaise.

“I don’t think having my face sucked off and getting a ‘stache rash would be all that re-chargy, personally,” Tracey adds.

Blaise chuckles and rubs a finger over his jaw.

“Nah, you’re probably fine. You look like you know how to do a shaving charm,” she says before flipping a page in her magazine, “Hey look! Muggles do astrology!”

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by the poison va venom meme that came out of Tumblr a while ago, and I wanted a look at Slytherins just being kids, not miniature masters of manipulation.
> 
> Let me know what you think.


End file.
